Thoughts of Who

So, I took a chance and shared this blog with a friend of mine today.  That would be the first (and maybe last) person I ever tell about this blog.  I want to remain an unknown entity.  I suppose it is a shame for me to think that I should work to remain anonymous on this blog, that I shouldn’t tell my friends or family about it.  It is that filter thing again.  Perhaps it is the ideal that people know me as the person I am, but not the person I write about….I’m not sure.

I guess it goes back to always being the one trying to do the right thing, be the right person. That begs the question…right for whom?  I am who I am for a reason.  For the past little while I’ve been wondering…who AM I really?  I guess I’m still, as many people are, trying to figure it out.  This is one of the reasons I write.

I write to get things off my chest.  I write to voice my opinion.  I write to share my emotions.  I write, because I can.  In junior high, I wrote short stories. In high school I wrote poetry.  I have always envisioned scenarios that would make really good short stories (at least in my opinion) if I actually wrote them down and fleshed them out.  The first poem I wrote in high school was about a boy I was in love with.  I never told him.  I WROTE a LOT of words brimming with that emotion.  Perhaps that inability to express my words aloud led to my ability to write them down in all their heartfelt glory.

I’ve learned that I write better when I’m experiencing some strong emotion.  I also write better when I’m not worried about what someone I know may say about my content.  Life shouldn’t be like that, should it?  With me worried about what someone would say if they knew I had these thoughts, these feelings?  Does that mean I’m “wearing the mask that grins and lies, that hides my cheeks and shades my eyes”?  (Do you know where that quote comes from? From one of my favorite authors…go Google it).  Does it mean I feel that I can’t simply be myself?

All questions for me to ponder.  Not tonight though. Right now, I need to go to sleep.

Where Have I Been?

Hello World.  It has been a long, long time since I last posted to this blog.  Years in fact.  I started this blog many, many years ago and had planned to write regularly.  That was the plan, anyway.  Life, however, has a way of getting in the way.  It did.  I have no excuses, not really.  It had been so long, in fact, that I almost forgot my password.  Almost.

Today, life is good.  When I first started this blog, life was tough but getting better.  I’m currently single, which I don’t mind (most of the time).  The year two thousand and sixteen is a brand new year.  The month of January in a new year is always a time of self reflection, a time when people make resolutions that many of them won’t keep.

I too, have made the decision to change some things.  My “resolutions”are to get fit, maintain my blog, build more streams of income, and perhaps finally change my place of employment.

One day I will look back at this blog and see some defining moments, perhaps.  Right about now, all I can see is tiredness.  I’ve had a long day, and I have to get up and go to work tomorrow.  Hmmm….what excuses will my Friday students use to try to ‘splain why their homework isn’t finished?

I predict that tomorrow I will be counting down the minutes until 3pm arrives and I can go home.

Have a happy Friday.  I will.